I hear these questions over and over again. It is understandable because there is a lot of coaching in this country, and almost everyone thinks that they are a coach. You could fill the entire IJsselmeer with all the people who call themselves a coach these days.
So there is plenty to offer, but I repeat: what should you do with a coach? Or is it just nice having someone who is listening to you?
And what should you discuss? Your life, your job, relationship, family or neighbours?
Life is busy, changes happen fast, and there is quite a lot going on in the world around us.
A coach can be helpful in this context. Usually, your intuition knows a bit where it has to go, but your actual decision is difficult.
A good coach can be the helping hand who assists with the essence of your decision. I repeat, your decision and no one else’s.
After all, the coach is a coach and not an advisor! Very important to make this distinction.
The advisor already knows everything and tells you what to do or tells you which direction you should go. A coach does not tell you what to do but instead helps with your route to your decision. And that is quite a significant difference in approach.
This approach requires the right attitude and a few crucial characteristics. The right coach is a great listener and has a genuine interest in… you! He cares about who you are, where you come from, where you want to go and why.
This person is eager to learn and curious about the phenomenon of you. As for the character: your coach should not be too happy with themselves, no need ego and not be blinded by the light.
I often walked through the Amsterdam forest with Jewish students and young Jewish professionals. The problem was usually the same: (upcoming) crossroads, a moment of change, a dilemma, an issue, etc. A solution always comes with strength and the combination of a cool head and a warm heart.
Finally, the most important thing: the click, the connection, the chemistry between you and your coach must be entirely right. You feel this almost immediately during the first meeting.
And… If it feels right, it is often a reasonable decision. Only with good chemistry can your coach, with a few helpful conversations, assist you in the birth of your decision.
